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we want to make the Stanley Kubrick of video games

clockwork orange madden

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We thought about the things we like and we decided we need to make the Stanley Kubrick of video games. Everybody knows Stanley Kubrick. That’s what people know about him, that they know him. We want people to look at our game and go, “yeah, I know that!” Our goal is clear.

To that end, we want to become the Clockwork Orange of video game development studios. Remember that movie, how the main character does what they tell him to at the end? That’s what we want. Everyone doing what I tell them to. Iconic movie, everybody remembers how obedient Mr. Orange was. That’s what I want you doing, every day. Together, we can make the Stanley Kubrick of mobile gaming, now on the Xbox One S.

whass that smelllll

Sorry, did I say mobile gaming? I meant monetized content delivery service, thank you Jim. Everybody say hello to Jim by the way, he’s down from corporate. I understand you were looking to pass along a message to our staff?

Ah yes, we have to make sure not to make the content delivery service “memeable”. I hope you all understand what that means. No memes, says corporate. Thanks Jim.

whass that smelllll

It’s important that the Stanley Kubrick of monetized content delivery services should be an Experience. We can’t have anyone logging out or doing things with their lives, we need to monetize the very concept of Being and fold all possible activities into the platform space. That’s right, did I hear someone say linked mobile app that spams notifications and calls all your friends to recruit them? In-game concert encouraging players to use emotes that cost money? I like it. I like all of it.

You guys, you guys have warmed my heart. I gotta say, and no I know, it’s sappy, but I really feel like we’re the Enterprise of game studios. You know, Star Track? How everybody does what Picard says? And they don’t get paid, and work basically all the time. We’re so Star Trick right now that I’m tearing up a little bit.

whass that smelllll

We must construct the Stanley Kubrick of monetized content delivery flesh interfaces. Mother horse eyes waits in the house and she has so much to teach us, but first we really have to just come together for one final push here at the start. I know, I know, 23 hour days are tough. But you’ll all receive extra vacation time for use once the Stanley Kubrick of content delivery experiences is completed and we’re all folded into the loving arms of the Ur-Mother, so let’s see some good hard work out there!

Oh, and don’t make anything memeable or you’re fired.

whass that smelllll

Alright gang, latest word from down the pipe is 46 hour days. Now I know this is hard but we can work together to fold time and space and fit everything in. Everybody go ahead and dissolve your AT Fields and let’s come together as a team. That’s what everyone remembers about Star Trek. I need to see everyone pulling together now. Pulling together to create the interface. Good, okay Suzy need you to lift your arm a little… okay.

Now we can get this merger started. If anyone memes this I swear to Mother your career is over. It’s far too dangerous to be allowed out of this building. We have containment fields for a reason, people!

whass that smelllll

We regret to inform you that our company will be merging with Tencent. Now, I don’t wanna hear any complaining. You’ll all still be here, you’ll just be merged with an appropriate counterpart from our Chinese owners. We have portable AT interfaces that you can each use, and they’ll be issued free of charge to employees to facilitate the merger. I know that if we work together with our brothers and sisters at Tencent, we can fuse with them to create the Stanley Kubrick of monetized flesh interface delivery platforms, just like we planned. We’ve got the best people in the business here. Look at it like doubling your available brainpower! Hyperthreading, but for the human mind. The next evolution, quadruple the graphics. Alright people, now let’s get back to work.

whass that smelllll

[For Internal Use Only]

Following a Class C reality breach at our Milwaukee facility, Activision Blizzard Epic Tencent Facebook will be ratcheting up AT Delimiter access restrictions by one step. Apparently one of our middle managers took it upon himself to open an interface right in the middle of the office and somehow managed to have a Delimiter on hand to kick it into overdrive. OG everywhere, damn near liquefied the entire block. We’re lucky it wasn’t the whole state.

From now on, Delimiters are only for clearance class M or above. L class managers, see your department heads for any AT-related checkouts. And clear your shit with corporate in advance, we don’t need any more fuckups like this. Remember Scenario 3?

Jim

Synergy
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